Annals of Bold Legal Marketing

I get emails from people marketing legal directories and whatnot all day but I particularly enjoyed the hubris of this one:

Hi Ron,
Your name was passed to me as a potential candidate for a Lead Counsel position on our Personal Injury panel in the Salisbury area. We are currently seeking a qualified attorney who can take additional casework. We do need to verify your qualifications in order to see if you are eligible for this position. This is a four attorney panel and we are only looking to work with one additional attorney. We currently have several candidates in review for the position. If this is something you would like to be considered for; I would need the preliminary info below returned within 24 hours.
How long have you been practicing Personal Injury?
shutterstock_121560805Are you in good standing with your State Bar?
Have you had any client related disciplinary action taken against you?
When is your next available time to have a phone appointment to discuss this position further? Please list a time and date.
Note: Only emails with an appointment time listed will be considered.
Colin Richardson
Director of Lead Counsel
Phone: 800-397-3743 ext. 7027
Fax: 800-220-4546
Need more Clients?

So he sends a cold call email (he left a message, too) agreeing to interview me for the “position” but will only consider me if I quickly follow his explicit instructions and have great credentials (like, you know, being in good standing with the bar). I love the strategy although I have to wonder how effective it is with prospects who have a third grade education.

UPDATE: Colin deserves credit for persistence after being mocked for creating false exigency he continues to create false exigency.

Hi Ron,
From what I got from the blog post is that you felt it was a good marketing strategy, so I’ll take that as a compliment. Bottom line is I’m not trying to waste your time or mine for that matter. You seem internet savvy, so if you have a few minutes to discuss the program let’s talk. But we already have two experienced and effective Maryland PI attorneys that are interested in the position, so the spot won’t be available much longer. Take a look at the panel, we have been working with a firm in your town for close to a decade now. I don’t think they would be throwing away hard earned marketing dollars for almost 10 years if this wasn’t working for them. In any event, thanks for putting my personal information on your blog, maybe it will bring me some new business!

Best of success,
Colin Richardson

It is worth making clear that I mean all of this in good fun. I don’t begrudge cold callers one bit and, for all I know, this is a fine product. I’m just poking fun at the self-referential sales pitch. I think if Colin were selling vacuum cleaners door-to-door, he would demand that I first prove to him that I keep a clean house before agreeing to sell me his vacuum.

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